No. 710 – Free Will

Performer: Rush

Songwriters: Geddy Lee, Alex Lifeson, Neal Peart

Original Release: Permanent Waves

Year: 1980

Definitive Version: None

Some songs bounce around for years before something sticks that becomes a definitive memory. This is one such song.

It seems like I’ve known it forever. Beth used to call it Free Willie for me, long before the movie of the same title came out. The first time I saw Rush in 1990, I prepared Jin by saying that they might not play a lot of old stuff, like Free Will, and, of course, Free Will was the third song out of the box.

But what I think about now was seeing Rush in 2007, which was Laurie’s first Rush show. Laurie was nervous ahead of time and not that she would be the only female in the crowd. No. Rush has that rep, but it’s nothing like when we saw Tool and Laurie was, in fact, the only female in the audience. OK, I’m exaggerating … but not by much. There were exactly two in our entire section, and Laurie was one of them.

Instead it was an issue where Laurie would have to drive to Tinley Park on her own. Back then, Laurie worked downtown, so she drove very little in the suburbs, and she was particularly nervous about finding her way to the Bank-Sponsored amphitheater. When we had seen CSNY there the year before, I drove, so it was no problem.

But this time, we had a problem. Laurie was going to do a staged reading for what could potentially lead to a nice lead role if the reading was turned into a full production, and the ONLY rehearsal day was to be the day of the Rush concert.

I offered to wait for her, so we could go together. I’d seen Rush nine times to that point; it wasn’t a big deal if we missed a few songs. Of course, I really didn’t want to miss anything, but it was worth it if it would give her peace of mind. Laurie didn’t know how long the rehearsal would go, and she didn’t want me to miss anything. You’re the Rush fan; I’m not, she said, and she insisted we go separately.

This decision made Laurie anxious. Not only would she have to find her way to the venue, but she’d also have to find me after she got there. We had assigned seats in the pavilion, so that wasn’t a real problem; the only real problem was the drive itself.

I gave her as good of directions as I could, but she even went so far as to warn that if she got too freaked out about the drive, she’d just head home. It was a bit over the top, but everyone has his or her neuroses. God knows I have more than my fair share.

So I took off and got there with plenty of time to spare to get settled in. We were in the amphitheater itself and had decent seats stage right, on Geddy’s side. The lights went down and no Laurie. I checked my cell. Nothing. The boys had a preshow video and then fired up Limelight.

Then they did back-to-back shockers—songs they hadn’t played in at least two decades. The first was Digital Man, which sounded fantastic, and then Entre Nous, which, of course, was a 27-year-old song they had never played live. How awesome is it when a band throws a bone to its longtime fans by playing something totally unexpected that only they probably would even know? Rush does this all the time, and I love it. Still, Laurie was nowhere to be seen.

I was starting to get the sense that she wasn’t coming at all, when the boys broke into the familiar opening peal of this song. And right at that moment, Laurie bounced down the aisle toward me holding two beers and wearing a big smile. “I just got here.” She was alight in the triumph of having made it all by her lonesome, and we celebrated to the music of Rush.

She’s been a fan ever since.