No. 178 – The Lee Shore

Performer: Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young

Songwriter: David Crosby

Original Release: 4 Way Street

Year: 1971

Definitive Version: CSN, 1991.

As I mentioned—a long time ago—we didn’t visit Mom’s side of the family nearly as much as Dad’s. That’s mostly because easy visiting was built in with Dad’s side of the family. Meem and Pop (and until I was 10, Nan) lived in Columbus, where we lived, and we went to Torch Lake every summer. Mom’s family lived in Marion, Ohio. Back then that was just far enough on two-lane highways to be inconvenient.

Consequently, Grampy’s death in the summer of 1976 didn’t register with me as much as perhaps it should have. It was bad, of course, but I knew that now I had a good chance to see my cousin Tommy, whom I hadn’t seen since 1971.

Tommy was the only other boy in the family at the time besides Scott, and I worshipped him like the older brother I didn’t have. Part of the reason I didn’t see him for as long as I did was that his family lived in Belgium for two years. It was then when he nearly died of some dreaded disease he picked up in Africa, and I was so relieved he didn’t. Now I was finally going to get to see him again.

Tommy was in Columbus when we got the bad news about Grampy (and when Dad took delivery of our new pinball machine, which irked me), but Jin, Scott and I were at Torch Lake at the time. In retrospect, it seems obvious we were cleared out of town on purpose as Grampy’s death to cancer drew closer, so Mom could spend as much time at the hospital as she wanted. Unfortunately, by the time we got home, Tommy was gone.

Fortunately, Aunt Sally would need to come to Marion a few more times, for the funeral and to take care of the estate, so I imagined Tommy would visit again during the summer. It never happened. (In retrospect, it also seems obvious that this shouldn’t have been surprising. Why would a cool 16-year-old want to leave New Jersey to come to Ohio just to hang out his twerpy 12-year-old cousin?)

Instead, Aunt Sally brought Betsy with her each time. Betsy, Tommy’ sister, was my age, but she was more Jin’s older sister that she never had but wished she did, so I was left out.

However, that changed at Grampy’s funeral, which was good because I was particularly disappointed that Tommy didn’t come for that. Afterward, Jin and Scott went with Dad back to Torch Lake while I stayed in Marion with Mom. (Truthfully, I wanted to go home to see Marty and the new pinball machine.)

So with no other kids around, Betsy and I bonded. We spent the afternoon after the funeral in the next-door neighbor’s pool, which was filled with algae, but we didn’t care. Then that night, because Mom and Sally took the bedrooms, Betsy and I ended up bunking together in Grampy’s den.

I described Grampy’s den before (good ol’ No. 754). It was just big enough for a sofa, a couple of end tables, a recliner and a TV. What I loved most about it though was that was where he kept his collection of Charles Addams books on the bookshelves over the sofa.

I was a huge comics fan when I was a kid. Peanuts was my favorite, but I loved anything that was cartoonish, like Beetle Bailey. When I was in Marion, I’d pull down Grampy’s Charles Addams books and pore through them over my bowl of Cinnamon Cap’n Crunch at the breakfast table in the kitchen. They were more adult than I was used to, but I got a lot of the humor, and it didn’t hurt when I learned that Charles Addams was the guy who created the Addams Family.

Anyway, that night while the remaining adults partied in the living room, Betsy and I stayed up and watched TV with the door to the den closed. Can you guess what this 12-year-old boy and 11-year-old girl watched that night? If your guess was the Republican Party convention, you’d be correct.

I didn’t know any of the issues; I was 12. But I understood that Gerald Ford, the president of the United States, was trying to be re-elected. I knew that a guy by the name of Ronald Reagan nearly beat him in the primaries but Ford hung on to win the nomination. In fact, I want to say we watched the night of Ford’s official nomination, but I’m not sure.

Years later, I mentioned this to Jin. Can you believe that a 12-year-old and an 11-year-old willingly watched the GOP convention—really ANY convention for that matter? Jin just shrugged. “This is you and Betsy we’re talking about.”

I took that to mean that the two of us were more politically aware and in tune with the news than anyone else in the family, and that might well have been true. But I think we don’t deserve that much credit. The reality is we watched it because it was ON. Back then, there were only three channels, and every one had the convention on. Our choice really was watch the convention or don’t watch TV.

The summer of 1976 was a tumultuous time in my life, and it was a time when I was listening to Four Way Street nearly every day, so I can apply some memory of that year (well, 1975 to 1977, really) to every song on there. It was a time when I could have used an older brother. Instead I had to settle for a less young sister, which wasn’t all bad as it turned out.

Oh, and when Grampy’s possessions were divided, I ended up with the Addams books. I still have them on my bookshelves.