Performer: Joe Satriani
Songwriters: Joe Satriani
Original
Release:
Crystal Planet
Year: 1998
Definitive
Version:
None.
When
Debbie and I went to Maryland for a long weekend in 1998, the Baltimore “half”
of the trip was the more interesting and memorable part, but the Washington “half”
had some interesting facets to it.
I
was excited to go to Washington, because the last time I’d been was in 1975. I
figured I’d appreciate more of the history of the nation’s capital as an adult.
The funny thing was, I got it—or at least most of it—as an 11-year-old in 1975,
so we didn’t need to spend a lot of time at, say, the Capitol or the White
House. Debbie and I hiked the length of the mall—that’s almost mandatory—but
the things that stood out were places we went that were new to me.
For
example, now I was big into art, so we did the Smithsonian art museum, which
was cool, although not as cool as the Art Institute in Chicago. We also checked
out the Vietnam War Memorial, which is as amazing as it is simple. Seeing the
names of those who were killed during the war would give anyone pause. It was
remarkable how quiet everyone is at the Vietnam War Memorial, as though we’re
all thinking the same thing.
I
reflected on how Dad could have been one of those names on the wall if things
worked out differently. Dad was in line to be drafted in 1963 and had planned
to sign up to be a helicopter pilot when President Kennedy announced that
fathers were exempt from action. Dad had just found out that Mom was pregnant
with me. He was lucky, and so was I. I can’t even comprehend how different my
life would be now if he went over and ended up on that black wall.
One
thing that Debbie and I did that was the same as before was go to the National
Cathedral and pay homage to Meemaw. Forgive me if I mentioned this already, but
Meemaw, my grandmother, was a silversmith and was commissioned decades before
to make a cross and candlesticks for the National Cathedral.
When
Dad and I went in 1975, the Holy Spirit Chapel was
being refurbished, and Meemaw’s cross and candlesticks were moved to the
basement where they stood ignominiously. By 1998, they were restored to their
place of glory off to the side of the main floor of the huge cathedral.
In
1998, Jin collected toothpick holders, which she still might, as well as floaty
pens, which I don’t believe she does. Anyway, I always kept my eyes open for
something to add to her collection, and my greatest contribution to her
floaty-pen collection came from the National Cathedral gift shop. It was Jesus
walking across the Sea of Galilee.
When
Jin received it, she couldn’t believe not only what it was but also that I
found it at a church. That seemed to add just enough of a blasphemous touch that
it not only became her favorite floaty pen, but it actually might have ended
her collection. After you find a floaty pen of Jesus walking on water, where do
you go from there? Exactly, nowhere.
If
that was the pinnacle of our purchases on the trip—and it was—that day also brought
about the trough. The hotel where Debbie and I stayed in Washington was in
Crystal City, which, of course, is just across the Potomac River in Virginia
close to the Pentagon. We went wandering around Crystal City for dinner when we
should have gone back to Georgetown. Instead we ended up having the worst nice meal
I’ve ever had.
It
was at an Italian place, the name of which I’ve long since forgotten, and it
was shockingly bad—and ridiculously expensive. The bill was $150, and it was so
bad, Debbie and I were in a foul mood the rest of the night—at least until the
couple in the next room woke us up in the middle of the night with their
animalistic mating. It was hilarious and an indication that it was time to get
home
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